love, joy, dance;

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

peek-a-boo!

today, i struggled quite a bit with my emotions.
inner conflicts are so damn annoying.
it makes you think, assume, and condemn.
i wanted to scream out loud,
but there was no voice.
i wanted to cry,
but there was no tears.
i wanted to run away,
but there was no where to go.
today, i wish we all could turn back time,
and go back to where we all started.
we thought we would grow,
and learn to love each other more,
but doesn't it seem like we're falling apart?
you know what?
i want to put the pieces back,
and not catch the pieces when it falls...
let's just try harder, alright?
we need just that little faith..

omg.
i think i'm really emotional today.
everyone knows,
friends are somewhat my life.
i really, really, love my friends.
but that doesn't mean i don't love my lover.
deep down, i do.
i need help with expressing.

btw,
zhou's dog, spot, is damn cute.
*fainted*

by the way, if you were wondering what happened at the SU booth for the past few days...
take a peep :)
enjoy. ciiao!

Fiona and Pam :)

Left: weiqiang, boss, pam, jeremy

Top: weiqiang
Left: pei, pam, kam, umar

peipei, pam and ice-cream. yummy yum!

something for my soul, somewhere

Sunday, March 26, 2006

boo.
seeing you so miserable,
makes me miserable too.
"what are friends for?"
goodness, today, i sit and ponder if i did enough as a friend..
i hope you'll grow stronger :)
i love you, my friend.

anyways,
my left eye has got an infection.
thank God for weiqiang.
hahaha, we walked to bukit timah plaza,
then took a bus to clementi,
and we finally found a doctor.
so, infection it is.
no contact lens for me for at least 1 week.
may drag up to 2 weeks if it doesn't get better.

the eyedrops he gave me is something like antibiotics.
stupid me, drank alcohol last night,
and had it swell like a goldfish.
damn, i seriously hope it gets better soon.
i look stupid in specs.

oh yes,
i'm sorry if i made you sad.
it was unintentional.
erh, don't be sad alright,
be the person you used to be.
everyone prefers you that way.

today, pam is feeling down.
but no worries.
i'll get back on my feet once this storm is over.
and i'm sure it'll be soon.
by then, pam will be stronger,
and yes, cuter. hahahaha.
i love you all :)

something for my soul, somewhere

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

"Today is book out day."

I'm back from trial camp :)
it was super duper good.
ok, i admit, vanessa, jasmine and i wanted to book out earlier,
BUT..
prometheus was really really enthu on day2.
and that made us stay.
we cheered, jeered, laughed, gossiped, cried, slept, bathed, suffered and enjoyed as a group.

there was one thing that touched my heart just now.
Peacock cried.
well.. he's the last person i would expect to cry.
whatever it is,
prometheus seriously rocks this camp.
i just know it.

oh yes, abt the camp:
-butterhill is fun :)
-we didn't wash toilets
-weiqiang, "you want shampoo?"
-mass dance is... interesting. (esp, when collin's my partner and dancing together with peipei, jasmine, vanessa.)
-OH YES! peipei fell while dancing. opps.
-peacock talking to the flag and acting like Darth Vader.
-pometheus phone conferencing.
-bathin in the guys toilet
-gossip sessions
-to be continued...

brain block. sudden interference.
hahaha.
i'm still rather affected by whatever that happened last night.
i'm.. scared.
:(

something for my soul, somewhere

Saturday, March 18, 2006

hellos again! :)

went to zouk last night.
gosh. it was... terrible.
sheesh, picture this:
underage kiddos,
kiddos with mismatched rags,
this idiot who cannot seem to stop grinding a girl,
oh yes,
little kiddos who refuse to go home,
and acting like idiots.
man. last night was a terror.
i thank God for faz, ting and gen.

had my first driving lesson today.
i think i'm a clown.
my instructor couldn't stop laughing.
he must have been entertained.

so i drove today.
and was a kan geong spider.
he was nice, he said i was doing well,
straight after that,
i stalled the engine three times in a row.
i'm just so damn impressive.
but he still said i was good.
next:
i reversed the car and nearly murdered everyone in the circuit.
oh wells, first attempt was a good attempt.

then he ended the lesson.
i was excited to leave,
(note: i was still holding the brake and the clutch)
and i reached for my bag and wanted to leave the car.
he was like, "AH JIE AH! hand brake!!!"
my gosh. i'm such a scatterbrain.

today,
i officially declare that driving's fun.
oh yes, i'm a major scatterbrain.
;)

something for my soul, somewhere

Monday, March 13, 2006

hellos :)

i'm addicted to playing sims 2.
gosh, i've been playing, and playing, and playing, and playing it.
and since i can't go to school today,
(cause i gotta look after the house, some air con's man at my place...)
i'll just play, play and play.
and also since camp's round the corner,
i should play, play and play.

excuses. sheesh.

i'm going to colour my hair tomorrow.
it doesn't look like hair now.
it looks like hay.
so, i'm going to colour it,
and get it some sort of treatment.
so it'll look less hay-ish.

i love juu.
switched on the fan for him in the afternoon,
and he slept like a log,
all curled up,
looking ever so blissful.
then i went to switch it off,
and looked at me,
and gave me the '
O-i'm-so-miserable-w/o-the-fan' look.
how can i not love him?
my precious black dog :)

something for my soul, somewhere

Friday, March 10, 2006

partied the night away again.
was an interesting night i must say.
First stop: MOS
ultra boring. grrrrr.
Second stop: gotham
it was just for the free housepours.
Third stop: zouk
and the party begins..
i went into the club with wenai.
got more drinks,
walked around.
saw alvin.
saw a drunk collin.
wow. the night was spent looking after him.
then we went to party.
but i must say, he makes a great entertainer.
"pemele" wow. he rocks.
dude, i respect you.

stayed over in school.
the sofa's pretty comfortable actually.
the aircon was bloody cold.
freaked my body out.
had meeting.
painted our flag. i say,
PROMETHEUS rocks.

anyways, just a lil something..
so, life isn't that smooth suddenly.
you pissed it,
you crashed it.
you made it the way it is now.
i wanted peace.
you blew every matter up.
every single conversation i had,
you had to show a face.
every message in my inbox,
you had to read.
everything i do,
you demand a valid explanation.
you're never happy with whatever i do.
never. you wished i never existed.
why?
so i didn't have to come in between you and your 'lover'.
its time to remove those masks of yours.

thanks for controlling my social circle.
thanks for bitching behind my back.
thanks for assuming that i'm a philanderer.
thanks for not being there when i needed a shoulder.
thanks for ostracizing.
thanks for drawing the line.
i'll keep to the other side.

that's all the assurance i need from you.
but you know what?
you're still loved.
i dont hate you.
just gimme time to love you wholeheartedly again.
this time round,
you really broke my heart.

"friends in need? i'll think about it."

something for my soul, somewhere

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

i just finished my dinner.
yeahyeahyeah.
instant noodles again.
right, i really wanna go on a holiday.
redang pleaseeee!
all the water activities.
i wanna wakeboard.
:(
trust me, i seriously hate you.
tomorrow's the 9th.
and you haven't gotten back to me yet.
you assh*le.
there isn't a need for me to be nice to you.
you big fat loser.
you're making me really pissed off.
you irresponsible shith*le.

ok. enough of the hate note.
on to happier stuff.

oh yes..
prometheus
sounds damn good.

its eight now.
meeting wenai at 1030.
i still haven't decided what i should wear.
crap. i think i'll be looking stupid tonight.
there's alot of different plans tonight.
its driving me nuts.

something for my soul, somewhere

Sunday, March 05, 2006

KRISTINE CALLED ME!
*grins*
i'm bloody happy :)
and i can't stop smiling.
hahahaha.

the first thing we did is to bitch.
what's new?
she can't wait to see me,
(like i'm not excited to see her)
she wants to do my nails for me,
(and i do her toenails... unfair exchange)
we wanna go shopping for more lingerie,
(wahahahahahaha!)
and we wanna go swinging,
and then we will tann under the moon,
count the number of stars,
sing out-of-tune,
and wait for someone to throw cans at us.
run to the supermarket to get ice-cream,
and look like total pigs.
EH, BIMBO. come back soon! ^^
(call me, call me, call me!)

went to some place in sembawang for dinner,
dinner was good.
we had beer :)
carlsberg's not that bad afterall.
oh yes,
we were practically in m'sia.
i recieved an sms:
"Welcome to M'Sia!"
i was speechless.
(btw, we could see fireworks in m'sia!)

daddy was laughing at me because of that supid sms.
he's so adorable.
he tried to read the fact-of-the-day beneath the snapple cap,
and he forgot his old flower glasses,
so he was practically..
blind.
then he tried to check out the reciept.
all he could see is,
"tax invoice"
hahaha. i love my dad.

and, we're planning to go redang for holiday!
post-anninversary honeymoon for my parents.
mummy's excited,
she's digging out her straw hat,
her sexy bikinis,
nice sarong skirts,
big shades,
and a HELL lot of sunblock.
that's my mama.

oh wells,
i think its time to dig for ALL my bikinis too!
yippie!
i so can't wait.
they asked me when we should go and guess what i said?
"THIS FRIDAY"
my parents fainted.
hahaha.

something for my soul, somewhere

Friday, March 03, 2006

i spent the day with wen ai today.
we ate alot. ok. I ate alot.
we talked alot, about simple topics...
-girls and growing up.
-clubbing and alcohol.
-church
-bitch about stuff
-and how spikenardz should talk about other stuff than looking good (read: fashion parade? omg.)
well, i think we talked till,
we were out of breath.

i've found another clubbing soulmate.
that's my dearest wenai.
MOS next wednesday.
should be with the other girls, and guys.
we were deciding which club we should go to..
(cocco latte, momo, zouk)
well done. and i'm the youngest of the lot.

joel was like, mos?
he's as excited as i am,
and he was like,
"you're dating me?"
hahahaha. indeed.
a big night out,
with people that i havent seen in a long while.
its like a family gathering.
just that its in a club now.
how cool is that?
we even joked about pastor and preachin in clubs.
that's so wrong of us.

something for my soul, somewhere

Thursday, March 02, 2006

the day's finally over.
it wasn't exactly a day i would brag about.
i didn't perform up to expectations for my cs paper.
sigh. blame it ALL on my bad memory.
i seriously need to do something abt the bad memory.
anyway, its gonna be a long entry today.

so, decided to indulge in some retail therapy.
mummy said she'll pay,
cause i'm sad today.
so sweet right??
anyway,
here's what i bought:
(not alot though)
- a pair of jeans from Mango
(i'm so glad, i'm a member. haha)
-a pair of sandals from.. i don't know.
-a pair of havaianas for JinWei's birthday.
and i spend a hell lot on food today.

oooh. talking about havaianas.
something happened at num (new urban male).
its rather long...
and this was what happened...
pam: errh, there's a discount right?
guy: uh, are you a ngee ann or nus student?
pam: ngee ann. (flashes card)
guy: (took the card, looks at it. smiled.)
pam: (looks at the cash register and stoned.)
guy: erh, what course are you in?
pam: (thinks: since when they ask so much?) ECH.
guy: which is?
pam: early childhood education
guy: oh, nice. i'm waiting for my posting, to get into NP.
pam: oh, cool. what course?
guy: aerospace. hope i can get in.. all my friends chose NP. and i chose only 1 course from NP, the rest are SP.
pam: that's nice! SP pretty near NP mah. what's you L1R4?
guy: 12
pam: cut off point for aerospace?
guy: 15
pam: WTH! sure can get in lah.
guy: (hands over card, smiles) hopefully!
pam: thank you.
guy: i sure hope to see you in ngee ann one day!
pam: right! >.< (smiles) alright, bye!
guy: bye!
WTH. len said it was the worse pick up line ever.
was it even a pick up line?
my goodness.

watched my girl & i.
damn, i cried and cried and cried.
len was so amused. he handed me a whole stack of tissue.
right. i was so sad lah. my favourite actress "died"!
crap. i shouldn't watch such shows.
my aunty called me today, and said,
"PAM! tomorrow's your trial test, i booked it already. you must pass before you can sign up for advanced theory."
WOW. i have SO much time to prepare for it.
i'm so prepared to fail.
rah. today's post is so long.
i shan't talk anymore.

OOOH! btw...
len bought me a whole collection of Heffalump soft toys.
omg! its so cute!
thanks! :)
i think i need to buy a display cabinet.

something for my soul, somewhere